Tuesday, July 30, 2013

Daily Dope: - The Great Anti-VIP movement

Now I understand the importance of wearing VIP brand of undergarments in the biggest democracy of the world. I was stopped from riding my bike on the road (for which I pay taxes) as I was not wearing the local brand of underwear named VIP. I though underwear’s won’t make a difference when I am on the Indian road, or as a matter of fact matter on Malawi, France, Nigeria, South Africa, Philippines, China, Zimbabwe etc but they do. This realization came while I was waiting for our some honourable minister’s (pronounced as sinister) and his VIP (Very Illiterate person) convoy to pass through as it was heading for some impotent work. The COPS were carefully checking everyone’s underwear to see who is a VIP and who is not. Later I came to know that in my honourable’s mister convoy everyone wore a VIP which I don’t wear. The cops were literally checking everyone’s undergarments just to see who is a VIP and who is not.. and they say we have higher crimes in developing nations.

(I am not wearing a VIP ... where can I get one)

The VIP movement was started not so long ago in the psyche of the people who started giving more importance to their servants, who worked hard for them and made sure that their masters are safe. The servants took care of the law and order, management of their roads, bridges, agriculture and all the entities of an economy. As a reward they were given the VIP chaddis (undergarments) as a mark of respect for taking care of the important work. They were also given some special privileges so that they can make their master’s work easier. The movement got twisted and the masters became servants and the servant’s masters just by the virtue of VIP chaddies (underwear). Now these so called public servants known as politicians can do whatever they want just because they are VIP branded. This includes brining the whole city to a halt just because they are passing from the same streets at the same time which are most crowded and important This blog gives the non VIP’s a full plan of action to prepare for a situation when a VIP is passing from the same area as you are:-
•Carry an empty bottle:- You are right, this is because the VIP always has a bigger bladder than you. Women just stay inside .. Public toilets are a concept for which Mr. Jairam Ramesh is still clarifying if it was toilet or temple.

•Carry your nail paints:- don’t need to carry the empty bottle you can carry your nail paints. If you have to go for a date, important meeting and don’t have time ....Indian roads will surely give you enough to at least Paint your nails.

•Playing Cards:- Carry playing cards, the Autos are so close by that you can make friends in the nearby Auto. Earn while on a run ...oh you can’t even gamble.

•Alcohol:- Use your eagle view to see the closest liquor shop..time will pass in no time..and may be some Cops will become your close friends
So many people face not just discomfort but have also lost their dear ones all to this stupid practice of stopping the traffic when a VIP passes. Doesn’t it make them easier target with so many high tech guns and snipers now days? If all this doesn’t help rise and shine for an anti VIP movement before our sinister ministers start eyeing even the last piece of cloth left on your bodies. Together we can and we will make a difference at least in our under wears if not the country ...
The power of VIP....

Get your VIP now! ...

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